im constantly in search of me

and I found myself recently. I mean
not wholly I know, but when my 'newly' attached bff talked and chatted and gossiped about having this "PHPS"(in short:post-honeymoon-period-syndrome) I found myself having all of these
but she is seriously getting it like NOW.
which is kinda worrying cause its barely a month plus la! (yups lols I sound like QQ righttt hahaha)
"PHPS" is something I thought of cause a relationship really get all boring and all
when we get really sian of our bf/gfs you know
like we get sick and tired of things that we loses the flexibility of our relationship.
for instance, we became very routine in our life spent together because
we forgotten the surprises which brought us together initially!
we forgotten to say 'I miss you' even when I just left on a cab home 10mins ago,
and everything we do we see the flaws in each other and MAGNIFIED even.
which seriously destroys this once ever loving and impulsive and heated and most importantly passionate relationship at first!
I guess I lost it during his going-to-ORD-days,
because I created a protective self mechanism inside and thought
im not going to care less,
its not going to change,
it wont help even if he has the time now.

its just me me me me me.

im very guilty of that in the beginning of our relationship
more so then.

and now I try
I tried rectifying not us
but more so myself.
and I found out that its really just that inner
devil that got us tightly
and you need to release that grip within you?
nobody says its easy
its gonna be difficult a choice and
I made one
I made it.

im living better now
I eliminate all kinds of negativity about him
because I really do
love him afterall.
this I asked myself.

so are you game?
hahaha

its 2 more freaking days
and 3nights in bkk sooon!!
im mad excited its the first time!
but I get guilty leaving to play and have fun but
my family doesnt.
now even gg out with my friends eating ho liao
I also will guilty.
all I can do is try to bring my ahma downstairs to talk to her friends every tuesday on her wheelchair vroom vroom
and we are on the go again!

but I would like to relax in bkk and not think of anything!!
I hope my family wait for me to be back happy and I could then share with them my experience there!

20jul-24july
bkk
6ppl aka 3couples
platinum mall
jj mkt
mbk
siam square
siam paragon
asiatique riverfront
etc.

back blogging about my bkk short getaway soon!!
ALL THE SHOPPING HAULS!
rockster-